Riot

And in that moment, I swear we were infinite. ~Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

The excitement wears off. The sun comes up; the streets get cleaned. Tiny reminders of the revelry of Saturday night persist, but life goes largely back to normal. Still, it's hard to forget the tension we felt during the game; the thrill of the last half-minute, when we were just waiting for time to expire and confirm our victory; and the catharsis that was one huge pep rally downtown.

What is it about school spirit that moves me? I get chills when a crowd of people, whether it's a mob at midnight on the corner of College and Shortlidge or 100,000 dressed in white in Beaver Stadium, chants "LET'S! GO! PSU!" It's that feeling of belonging, that sense that for a few hours every week, there's a common goal (winning!) coupled with a common emotion (varying degrees of happiness) for most everyone on campus or in this town.

I gotta say, though, I most certainly did not feel like I belonged at the Sarah Palin rally last night. From the overwhelming whiteness of the crowd to the raucous cheering at certain portions of her speech with which I most definitely did not agree, I felt exactly like the non-supporter spectator I was. Of course, I asked for it (just as I asked for standing outside in the cold for one and a half hours to see her), because I was very curious to see what the rally would be like. Therefore, I'm not complaining, but rather drawing a contrast, that merely being among a fervent crowd does not a sense of belonging produce. Between me and Sarah Palin, there was no common goal and no common emotion, but for the majority of the crowd, I'm sure she was preaching to the choir.

I think it's human nature to want to belong somewhere, but for myself, in particular, I think it is also a symptom of being an only child for so long. I didn't really have trouble fitting in as a kid, but I was always yearning for the closeness others seemed to have with their siblings and trying to find that with my friends. Even today, I have my doubts about how close I will ultimately be with Flip, and I put an enormous amount of emotional stock in the friendships I have. And so, even seemingly trivial events like venturing to Beaver Canyon after the win over Ohio State or dinners with friends really make me happy - happy to have the friends that I do and happy to live the life that I have.